Building Resilience with the SCARF Model in Uncertain Times

Over the past several years, I’ve faced situations where I felt my voice didn’t matter—that my opinions and ideas weren’t being heard. Sometimes, what I shared was even taken and passed off as someone else’s. These experiences left me questioning my value and struggling with feelings of invisibility.

Have you ever been in a situation where you felt your voice wasn’t valued or heard? Or perhaps you’ve shared something important, only to feel it wasn’t acknowledged—or worse, it was misused?

It was only when I reflected deeply that I realized: I wasn’t in environments that felt psychologically safe. The lack of safety to express myself fully held me back, both personally and professionally.

As a survivor of sexual assault, I’ve also had to work hard to overcome shame and reclaim my voice. It’s been a journey, but one thing I’ve learned is this: resilience begins with creating spaces—internally and externally—where we feel safe, seen, and valued.

How often do you feel truly seen and respected in the spaces where you work, learn, or connect with others? Do you find yourself holding back ideas or opinions because the environment doesn’t feel safe or supportive?

I want to explore the SCARF model and how we can build resilience, not just for ourselves but also in the spaces we create for others. This journey is about learning how to reclaim control, foster connection, and create a sense of stability—even when the world feels unpredictable.

My hope is that these tools inspire and empower you to strengthen your own resilience, no matter what challenges you’re navigating.

With gratitude,

Dr. Anne

🧣SCARF Model

With everything going on in the world, many of us are feeling the weight of constant change and unpredictability. It can be overwhelming, but there are ways we can build resilience to help us find stability and peace—even when things around us feel chaotic.

This model, developed by neurobiology expert David Rock, breaks down five core areas that impact our resilience: Status, Certainty, Autonomy, Relatedness, and Fairness. By exploring each area, we can learn simple but effective ways to strengthen our resilience in challenging times.

We will cover:

🧣How to find value in our unique contributions (Status)

🧣Creating routines to bring a sense of certainty (Certainty)

🧣Reclaiming small areas of control (Autonomy)

🧣Building deeper connections to feel supported (Relatedness)

🧣Cultivating a balanced mindset, even in unfair situations (Fairness)

🧣Status

Status is all about feeling valued and respected. It’s easy to feel vulnerable when things around us are uncertain, but recognizing our own strengths can provide a solid foundation of self-worth.

Small Practice: Take a few moments today to reflect on recent accomplishments or things you’re proud of. Write them down as a reminder of your unique value. Each small success reinforces your importance and contributions, which can ground you when facing instability.

Building resilience starts with valuing yourself. 

🧣Certainty

Certainty refers to our need for predictability. When everything feels uncertain, even small, predictable routines can help ground us.

Think of creating daily touchpoints—a morning ritual, an afternoon break, or an evening wind-down practice. These moments give us small pockets of stability and allow our minds to rest.

Practice Idea: Choose a simple routine, like a daily walk or five minutes of journaling, that you can stick to no matter what’s happening. These moments of certainty can bring comfort and a sense of normalcy, especially in challenging times.

🧣Autonomy 

Autonomy is about feeling we have control, and in uncertain times, it can be especially important for our well-being. Even small decisions—like what you read, how you spend a quiet moment, or a goal for the day—can remind you that you have choices. These small acts of control can build a stronger sense of empowerment and resilience.

Actionable Step: Identify one area where you can make a choice today. Maybe it’s deciding on a creative hobby or simply setting a personal goal for the day. These small choices can help you regain a sense of control and calm.

🧣Relatedness

Feeling connected to others can provide comfort, especially when things around us feel unstable. Building genuine connections can remind us that we’re not alone in our struggles. Sharing experiences, listening, and simply being present with those around us can make all the difference.

Practice Tip: Reach out to a friend, family member, or community today. Whether it’s a quick message or a heartfelt conversation, these moments of connection remind us that we’re part of something bigger.

🧣Fairness

Fairness highlights our need for balance in our interactions and experiences. When we feel slighted or frustrated by circumstances beyond our control, it can be easy to get caught up in negative emotions. However, cultivating empathy—for ourselves and others—can help restore our sense of balance.

Mindful Practice: Next time you feel frustrated by a situation, take a moment to pause and breathe. Practice kindness and compassion, both toward yourself and those involved. This balanced approach can keep you grounded and resilient.

As you continue to navigate your path, I encourage you to revisit these concepts and practice the small steps we discussed. Resilience is a journey, not a destination—and each step you take strengthens your ability to face challenges with courage and grace.

References:

1. Rock, David. Your Brain at Work. HarperBusiness, 2009.
   An approachable look at how neuroscience can help us navigate the modern workplace and manage stress and uncertainty.

2. Rock, David. “SCARF: A Brain-Based Model for Collaborating With and Influencing Others.” NeuroLeadership Journal, 2008.
   A foundational article introducing the SCARF model, explaining how understanding brain-based needs can help us foster resilience.

3. Maslow, A.H. “A Theory of Human Motivation.” Psychological Review, 1943.
   A classic resource on human motivation, emphasizing the need for self-esteem and recognition as fundamental to well-being.

4. Neff, Kristin. Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself. William Morrow, 2015.
   A compassionate guide to building self-worth, valuable for anyone working on resilience and self-acceptance.

5. Sinek, Simon. Start With Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action. Penguin Books, 2011.
   Discusses the power of clarity and purpose—helpful for understanding the human need for predictability and security.

6. Kabat-Zinn, Jon. Wherever You Go, There You Are: Mindfulness Meditation in Everyday Life. Hachette Books, 2005.
   Offers insight into creating mindful routines that anchor us, even amid uncertainty.

7. Pink, Daniel H. Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us. Riverhead Books, 2011.
   Examines the importance of autonomy as a motivator, with practical suggestions for fostering a sense of control in everyday life.

8. Deci, Edward L., and Ryan, Richard M. “Self-Determination Theory.” Contemporary Educational Psychology, 1985.
   A foundational paper on self-determination theory, exploring how autonomy impacts motivation and well-being.

9. Brown, Brené. The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are. Hazelden Publishing, 2010.
   Focuses on the power of connection and vulnerability, reminding us of our deep need for relatedness and belonging.

10. Lieberman, Matthew D. Social: Why Our Brains Are Wired to Connect. Crown Publishers, 2013.
    Explores the neuroscience behind our need for social connection, explaining why relationships are central to resilience.

11. Haidt, Jonathan. The Happiness Hypothesis: Finding Modern Truth in Ancient Wisdom. Basic Books, 2006.
    Examines the human need for fairness and justice, offering insights on staying balanced in an unfair world.

12. Rock, David. “Managing with the Brain in Mind.” Strategy+Business, 2009.
    Discusses fairness in the workplace and how to foster fair, respectful environments that support well-being.

13. Siegel, Daniel J. The Developing Mind: How Relationships and the Brain Interact to Shape Who We Are. Guilford Press, 2015.
    An insightful resource on how resilience and adaptability grow through experiences and relationships.

14. Brown, Brené. Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts. Random House, 2018.
    Offers tools for resilience-building in work and life, with an emphasis on courage and connection.

15. Rock, David. “SCARF in 2020: Updates to the Brain-Based Model for Collaborating with and Influencing Others.” NeuroLeadership Journal, 2020.
    Provides a refreshed look at the SCARF model, including practical applications for education and collaborative settings.

16. Noddings, Nel. The Challenge to Care in Schools: An Alternative Approach to Education. Teachers College Press, 1992.
    Explores the importance of caring and resilience in educational settings, offering inspiration for building compassionate classrooms.

17. Siegel, Daniel J., and Bryson, Tina Payne. The Power of Showing Up: How Parental Presence Shapes Who Our Kids Become and How Their Brains Get Wired. Ballantine Books, 2020.
    Although focused on parenting, this book provides excellent insights for educators on creating secure, supportive environments for children.